|
1. Underbrush.
Consistency is often recognized by us as what stays the same because we leave it be. We don't take awareness of anything special or individualistic about something. We get lazy and let our expectations and assumptions build a world around us. That world keeps changing. Our perception of it does not. We are doing what we are friendly with, find easy, understand, receive encouragement from others for, and, do out of fear of abandonment or rejection by those around us. We let that underbrush of dead and dry old experiences lead us into laziness. We become comfortable and confident. Then, a day arrives which we were not expecting.
Buying furniture that has been factory produced for assembly at home is a trend in North American and other economies since 1999. By 2009, it has become one of the major sources of new furniture for these markets. The size of the market has enabled the production of items in quantities of thousands. This has been facilitated by the development of an industrial base in China, and elsewhere, in which the most modern, most specialized, most energy efficient machinery is being purchased and used. After a century of mechanical and electronic innovation and expansion in North America, Japan, and Europe, economic colonies beginning in the 21st century can begin with the result while the originators and developers continue to be bound by the weight of older and more costly technology. The rich are going into debt in hopes that the poor will bring them greater riches.
Solid wood furniture made in small factories or by special order to wood craftsmen was an earlier economy. Many crude pieces were made for the many poor people. Most were lost or discarded when they broke, fell out of favor, were destroyed in fires and floods, or, found a competition from production and imported designs and materials. Solid wood took much effort with crude tools, or less effort with costly motorized tools. Either way, it was a major expense to one's budget. A family might take decades to fully equip their house. With time, solid wood quickly deteriorated in the poorer of homes. Seasonal changes in temperature and humidity encouraged warping and cracking. Population expanded with health care improvements. Product demand demanded Quantity. Economy demanded lowered costs.
Industry made furniture began to provide simply made, functional pieces in great numbers. Jobs often meant relocation from one's parents. Marriage encouraged further separation from the birth home. With the expansion of mass commerce through office, retail, service, production, and entertainment enterprises, organizations and cities grew in size. Increasingly, workers lived distant from their workplace. Transportation became mandatory. Wages grew, but the cost of making a wage kept up. Once, children shared a home and workplace with their parents until they were mid-adult and married. Increasingly, to have an income, one had to acquire added education or training, adopt credit, purchase transportation, and, rent/buy/save for a residence. And that residence needed furniture.
Getting more house, furniture, savings, freedom, ... became a motivation for doing more of the support activities oneself. With vehicles becoming more complex and customizable, and with machinery and tools becoming more powered and powerful, a Do-It-Yourself industry was born. The ideal was to save money and have quality. The reality, too often, was one of spending money, on a tool selection that would never be enough, and that would often be succeeded by new variations which were easier to use, more powerful, and, more versatile. The reality also, was that, often, the personal projects of the inexperienced and the poorly skilled weekend carpenter or mechanic were crude, or, failures.
Globalization and population increases added a new twist.
The wages of many decreased relative to the cost-of-living as their jobs were increasingly done by workers living in other countries where expertise was rising faster than wage levels. Efficiency and productivity demands to meet such competition encouraged a greater concentration of effort at the workplace. More stress and more demands with less rewards were played to by advertising the life you want NOW with the tool of credit and the promise of pleasure. Choices for the material, the social, for entertainment, for distraction and denial ... exploded in number. So little time left for ??? that for many, it became questions of
- Joining In, or, Separation?
- Job, OR, Family?
- Stability, or, Confusion?
- Income, or, Debt?
- Relaxation, or, Weekend Work?
Population CHOICES and the market they created have decided, for many, that one will likely ..
- change their career to retain an income,
- change their location to maintain a job,
- change their diet to try and stay healthy,
- change their relationships to retain sanity,
- change their entertainment to avoid risk,
- change their car to change their identity,
- change their furniture to adapt to changes.
Furniture can be the underbrush for the person with CFS-ME.
It can toxify you deeper with indoor air pollution.
It can provide comfort and security, stability.
It can sap the little energy you have.
It can bring you Joy, or, dread.
It can make change difficult.
It can raise conflict or calm.
Limits?
2. Ignition.
What CHANGES underbrush into Fire?
All that underbrush is just sitting there.
It is YOU who are adding to it. It doesn't grown by itself.
You are either maintaining as clear a grounds as possible, or, you are allowing the underbrush to collect into higher and thicker mounds. What sets it ablaze may be nothing that YOU do. Spontaneous combustion usually results from what we DON'T do. We don't clean up and put away oily rags. We leave volatile reactive chemicals open and in proximity to each other. Others may flick a match or a spark may fall from THEIR favorite addiction, a cigarette.
YOU and YOUR Guardians may allow YOUR health to deteriorate slowly and quietly, until, a new change breaks the dam. Your GUARDIANS are those who are responsible for you, by birth (parents), those who may accept responsibility for you (friends, spouses, relatives, associates), those who are given authority to accept that responsibility (employers, unions, government representatives, doctors, health care workers), and, yourself. Chances are good that many of these "guardians" don't want the job, don't know they have been assigned to it, are in denial of accepting it, are incompetent in its performance, or, simply, don't care. Society and institutions, with our acceptance, give OUR Power to others with the Intention that it will be for Our benefit. As you know, Good Intentions often result in the opposite effect.
REALITY
Population grows.
Power grows from Group Action.
Group Action requires negotiation, agreement, joining in.
Groups grow too large for efficiency and demand leaders.
Leaders divide the workload between offices & departments.
Power becomes assigned, deferred, regulated, sanctioned.
YOU are being told what, where, how, when, and, why ...
Standards are set to provide Order, Security, and, Penalty.
Others are taking the Power YOU give to them to allow you to be part of THEIR group. Yet, if YOU die or become ill because of the Truths and Principles and Laws and Morals THEY have decided were best, on your behalf, those errors become YOUR responsibility. In most cases, those who set the institutional rules and limitations are ignorant of and unconcerned about YOU. The great deception is that you have come to Believe in a FANTASY which you wanted to be: a world in which everyone else would sacrifice for YOUR benefit ... and all you would have to do is love them for making your life beautiful. But they believe the same fantasy, and that means, YOU owe THEM their life of ease. And where YOU make that a difficult outcome for them, you deserve exclusion.
You don't make many other people happy when you acquire CFS-ME.
It isn't YOUR fault, yet it often is a Reality, for them; perhaps you.
YOU are letting THEM down. YOU are making THEIR lives difficult.
YOU represent a problem for them which they are not prepared for.
The easy solution is for them to simply send you BACK.
Back to Where?! Out of their lives, offices, responsibility.
What are you gonna do?
Count on Yourself!
Be thankful for any additional assistance.
Preparing for the next winter was going to be enhanced if we could get a self standing closet which could be used as a Pantry. It would store bulk and reserve foods in the coolest part of the house. It would also afford a dark and dry interior which would assist in preservation of the contents. Our food supply would be more dependable and less costly. We would have to travel to the store less often. There would be less time, effort, gas, and car expense. We could buy some things in bulk. There were a few local retail options for the cabinet. All of them provided ready-to-assemble packages of pre-cut composite wood pieces, covered with laminate, and held together with provided hardware. ALL options were made at factories located thousands of miles away, in another country, by people who would likely never personally use a similar unit themselves. There were a few decisions to make.
Size.
We wanted a cupboard we could store longer-term supplies of food in. We had been using a corner of one less used room. That afforded only as much space as we could pile high. Items were placed into boxes on boxes. If we required something from a lower box, the upper ones had to be moved away first. Then, we sorting through the lower box until we found our prize. Then repack and re-pile. And, we had to place a partition between the food storage and the rest of the room. Altogether, the arrangements made the room look much smaller. It would be much more useful to have an upright cabinet with shelves and doors. Best if it would fit the width we were using already. And the depth needed to be deep enough to put the large storage containers we were using. Getting a size that would be too small would not enable us to pack away what already occupied the corner. Too large in size and setting out the room for other uses would be much more difficult, even possibly, impossible.
What size is our Recovery Plan?
With CFS-ME, one also is best to consider how large is their treatment span of geography going to be? Do we have the resources to travel to the nearby towns/cities, or, to another state or province, or, to another country? Do we have the resources to have paid help come in? Are there friends, family, or others who would share coming in periodically to read to us, pick up our grocery or supplement order, tell us about THEIR lives, wash the laundry, take us to appointments, watch a movie with us, do minor repairs, take our mail to the post box, share their hobby with us. We will not be able to physically exert ourselves much. If we don't keep challenging our mind, it will coast downhill past dementia to a standstill. Too much reliance on any person or persons will make them and us co-dependent, or, encourage them to retreat. At the same time, we must Appreciate their willingness, or the potential of their willingness, to show them respect and encouragement in what they do.
Ask for too much; you may receive nothing.
Ask for too little; you may receive nothing.
Cost.
Like most of you, we don't have a lot of money.
Each of us, before CFS-ME struck, or afterwards, scaled down our possessions from larger housing with many furnishings and personal memories to almost nothing. We had just relocated several thousand miles across Canada and were temporarily renting in lieu of a business start up and purchase of a more permanent dwelling, when the Pause arrived. At that point, we could move all of our belongings in a car. The Pause became a significant interruption. We spent the first 2 years of our battle with CFS-ME, in off season rentals. Beeches in the winter. Ski slopes in the summer. The duration were sometimes dependable; other times, what was expected to be 9 months was cut to 2 by the landlord, for THEIR personal reasons.
Eventually, we sought to stabilize our expenses and the stress of moving by purchasing an old mobile home. It appeared to be in very good condition in a very good health environment. It was empty. It had to have all the basic furnishings, and some basic appliances. For reasons of cost and quality, we ended up 30 km from towns with a good range of retailers, doctors, therapists, and other suppliers. For transportation economy, and time and energy economy, we sought to make our trips to town as productive as possible. Those with CFS-ME know what we mean. One day to town. Two to five days to recover. One of us sleeping on the back seat. Leaving late. Home early. Whenever possible, larger quantities for longer-term inventory was the only beneficial option. We would have benefited by having the pantry earlier. Availability, a place to put it, energy to assemble it, and cost, necessitated a delay until we had well recovered. Now, we were proceeding with constructive plans for the future.
The Choice was not Relevant before, for our health Recovery.
Like most of you, we don't have a lot of money.
We invested a lot during our Recoveries ... in our health therapies, supplements, medical trips, drugs, devices, knowledge. Fortunately, from the decisions we had individually made during the earlier part of our lives, we had assets, skills, and goodwill to survive on. We would not have survived without ALL of these. If you have wasted a lot of your time on more short-term goals and material achievements, you will have to innovate in ways different from us. No amount of either of these -- assets, skills, goodwill -- will get you to Recovery. You may be able to trade some for others. And, you have a huge savings and benefit in the information being made available to you on these pages. If you follow the suggestions, you can avoid a lot of costly common mistakes, and make a lot of relevant decisions.
We were Very Fortunate with our CHOICES.
I had committed myself to learning how to receive Spiritual Guidance accurately during the previous 15 years. During that time, I had been able to greatly assist myself and many others in maintaining or recovering health. I had done this only by having developed the SKILL of accessing Spiritual Guidance. My wife developed her own skill in this area during her sickness and became an active contributor. It was with this constant, ever present support, that we were able to find the modalities and therapists who could best assist us, from what was available to us. In most cases, this was defined as Local. Anything further was greatly limited by travel time and expense. Over time, we became aware of more options, and more options became available that had not existed previously. You may not have developed this skill, yet you do have a considerable Resources in these pages of ways in which you can understand and communicate about CFS-ME, and, supplement and therapy options which hold a good potential to assist you.
A Financial Fire is when costs get out of control.
With CFS-ME, the actions you take and the choices you make will decide the costs. If you do nothing, your costs will involve your living expenses for the rest of your life. What was affordable with an income, will often drift into exorbitant. You will have to downsize; possibly move to a new town or region. If you choose to be aggressive in your thrust for Recovery, you will find it easy to spend hundreds of dollars on therapies, supplements, and devices .. with the hope that in the following few months YOUR corner will be turned and health will burst forth again. Too often, even with correct decisions, you will feel you are recovering, only to seem like you are sliding back again. If you give up, perhaps ALL of your steps forward will be lost. To continue is to pour more time and effort and money forth without a clear understanding as to whether you are making any progress or not. The information on these pages can help you make your questions, and choices, Relevant.
Relevancy can contain the Flames.
Features.
Are the savings worth the cost?
If a Solution becomes a Problem, the sparks of frustration can ignite a fire of anger. In considering the purchase of a Pantry cupboard, there were 2 style and many variations. The styles included upright units of varied depths and widths and a standard height. One could have either two doors on the front, or, 1 door and 1 slide-out section of shelves. Many other styles, available over the previous decades, had been discontinued by market demand and impracticality. The difference in cost between the discount price available to us for the slide-out unit, and, the retail price of the two door, were within a few dollars.
Which feature(s) were "cooler"?
If we got the 2-door, every time we wanted anything that was not at the front of any shelf, we would have to remove or move around everything in front of the desired item. With the 1-door and slide-out, the smaller items could be easily stored on the shelves in the slide-out. Within seconds, EACH would be easily available. Fast to store. Fast to retrieve. With the 2-door, anything smaller would potentially become slow to store and slow to retrieve. Over a long period, for the sake of $10 on $150, one could avoid, or invite, a lot of frustration. What could have been a Solution, could become a Problem.
Too few features and you have work housed in a fancy container.
Too many features and you have convenience with complexity.
Simplicity can be cost without benefit.
Complexity can be cost with dangers.
Relevancy will balance cost and benefits.
The Features are the Package.
How many things can you treat, with CFS-ME?
If a Recovery becomes an Escalation of illness, it's over.
Someone puts you on antibiotics and you get systemic Candida.
You have a decimated immune system = open invitations.
Dying from the complications of cancer or heart attack is not a plus.
Taking anti-parasitics that wipe out your intestinal flora = bad news.
Treat too little; you get weaker. Treat too much, you get weaker.
You must treat more than one ailment at once, to strengthen.
Is there such a thing as "Companion Illnesses"?
You have multiple severe illnesses with CFS-ME.
You can determine which of a number of them YOU have.
You can find therapies, herbs, practitioners to treat each.
You can weigh which treatments will have Group benefits.
It isn't whether to detox or to rid self of parasites.
It is how do you do BOTH so you can get more oxygen!
Too few treatments and you have effort wasted.
Too many treatments and you have benefits reduced.
Simplicity can be one hole repaired in the dam.
Walk away with 11 holes still bleeding, and ....
Trying to build a new dam, while the old one leaks,
And the flood from the old one submerges the new works.
Relevancy will balance selection and benefits.
Timing.
Timing can douse a potential fire, or strike sparks.
Firefighters in the wrong location when the fire breaks out, are useless. Firefighters leaving the smoldering embers before they are cold, may find it re-ignites when they are far away. Brush cutting crews which are delayed by tight budgets because no one considers their work necessary, cannot lessen the likelihood of an inferno. Waiting, being in denial, despairing, ... each add their weight to the mortality scale.
Move, or Die!
You work with others.
They share the responsibility for the result: failure, or, success.
We had ordered our furnace replacement as early as we were allowed.
It had been delayed by what the furnace person was not aware of.
The industry, supplies, prices, and availability had changed.
What he KNEW was not NOW. It was 10 years out of date!
Yet he was treating it as Now = repeated errors of timing.
No one controls the weather from year to year.
It becomes a built in variance of magnitude.
Coupled with human error, it threatens to ignite confusion.
The availability of the Pantry cupboard was not an obstruction.
Until it became a Problem enhanced by furnace labor problems.
More humans involved. More potential for benefits, or, failures.
There had to be a factor of consistency and persistency.
Waiting encouraged costs to rise and times to conflict.
I could take the lead, or fall back, be dependent, cancel.
I paused my longer-term urgent work to dispel confusion.
I started the pantry, called Customer Service, ordered parts.
Set that aside and began the furnace exchange, step-by-step.
Went as far as I could with the furnace, then back to my own work.
With parts in hand to complete the furnace, then the pantry ...
I completed both and moved on with focus.
ALL of our decisions were made with the help of Spiritual Guidance.
From OUR experience and viewpoint, that would make them the best made decisions, for us. I have learned over several decades that such decisions are sometimes for the benefit of one's Mission and not so much for the shorter-term pleasure of the individual. A part of my Mission is to provide this information and options to others, based on my experience and research. I can't do that if I avoid the difficulties that many other people are experiencing.
Many pieces are provided in this work.
You may not need them all, but you will benefit with increased awareness from them all. THAT may help you to understand and assist others better towards THEIR Recovery. It may enable you to encourage modifications in the institutions which could serve people with problems better. It may save you from a return to such an illness environment again in the future, or, to keep you from that now, as a preventive measure. A few pieces that will only benefit a few people now, and not be enough to safeguard them more fully and assist them further, is not good enough!
Providing just another small piece of a huge puzzle and then saying that I Recovered and the rest of what you need is either up to you, or, even worse, denying that there are any more pieces you need, for success, in not very helpful. Many have done that to us before. My experience here is to show you what is USUAL, Possible, and, Preferable. I can do that because I HAVE been there, and Survived. The Ignition Point of a devastating fire (serious chronic illness) arrives suddenly, unexpectedly, forcefully. It encourages panic, denial, avoidance, guilt, and shame. It does this because unconsciously, relevant or fantasy, we feel we could have done something different and prevented the fire.
But when the fire is here.
What are you going to do?
3. Damping Down.
Once you make a Choice, it may become increasingly difficult to reverse it.
I decide upon a useful piece of furniture, designed and produced by a company that manufactures thousands of the same design, available from a local store with a solid history good products at good prices, and paid for with a once-a-year discount price. I arrange for delivery of the package of pieces to my home. I take delivery. I make time to begin. Delays happen. Eventually, the box is opened.
I begin to build upon past experience.
I have purchased a number of other furniture units from this and similar multinational companies during the past 3 years. They have had a tendency to share a common set of Deficiencies. In most cases, there was no other options besides
- Returning the purchase for a credit.
- Buying a unit with less features.
- Paying more for a similar unit.
- Resigning myself to live without it.
- Patiently working out the problems.
I CHOOSE as I am Spiritually Guided.
The selected option is to patiently work out the problems.
With few exceptions, this has been the follow through, for me, whenever difficulties and problems have been encountered in the Past. I have a very good track record of Successful Resolution. I have strong Basic Personality traits which support this direction. I have much academic and life skills which support this direction. I have acquired considerable experience through the Practical application of this Strategy in the fields of new construction, customer service, business development, mechanical and electronic repairs, renovations, and, health counselling. In other words, it would be very difficult for me to simply return this item because it had a few small problems ... especially after waiting for 6 months to get it. I could, and I have returned things before. It would be difficult.
Damping down a fire involves making a plan to PREVENT flames.
It may be spontaneous, built on previous experiences and well used skills.
It may be more rational, with slow and cautiously made decisions.
It can be a combined effort where others join in to share the efforts.
To be relevant, it must be timely.
Too long, and the fire takes control.
There are factors which can delay and cloud responses.
These can change a speedy and successful response into a lengthy set of reactions and choices which threaten us with failure, anxiety, fear, anger, and loss. Often, these factors are external. They present us with Choices which introduce unplanned, or unexpected CHANGE. It is in those instances when we are challenged .. to
- Stay on Track.
- Deny Urgencies.
- Endanger Opportunities.
- Abandon Limits.
- Sacrifice.
Stay on Track.
Whether you are quieting or preventing a fire, a disaster in putting together a cabinet, or doing your best to avoid or recover early from CFS-ME, there are a few Tactics which can assist for success common to all of them. With the cabinet, you have taken delivery of it. It will be easier to adjust for any difficulties if one can begin building it as soon as possible. The longer one waits, the less reassuring and willing the customer service department will be. They may suspect that the longer you waited has a connection with the more damage you effected on the cabinet during or after assembly and that a complaint NOW may be a deception to simply cover over the costs of your own incompetence.
Waiting too long to begin seeking medical and health care assistance to recover from a Package of severe chronic illnesses, may suggest that you are not as sick as you say you are and simply want an excuse to be paid while you take a sick leave from a job you don't like. As many with CFS-ME can attest to, if they have sought such assistance earlier than 6 months, they are likely to be informed that the accepted standard for duration towards a positive diagnostic assessment of CFS-ME is 6 months. At the same time, many therapist and doctors in a socialist or a group health environment will be skeptical of a person who end up at their offices with a statement that they have had the symptoms for 6 months, and here they are. Better to use a little tact and present the situation to your holistic doctor and/or therapist both after a 3-month interval, and again after the 6-month date.
A landowner who called up the nearby fire department and said they were concerned about all the underbrush that had collected in their area over the previous 10 years, and the potential for an immediate wildfire, during the wettest part of the year, might be ignored. Similarly, if they called to report that a fire had been smoldering near their buildings for the past 3 days, and had now developed flames ... the fire chief might wonder if the caller was in some way involved in the start of the fire. If you are appearing to warn of a "wolf" near the flock, many times over a period of months, yet none is ever found ... your cries for help may be diminished when you actually see a wolf, take some careful action, and calmly herd the wolf into a corner to keep it Present.
Staying on Track is about becoming aware of the likelihood of a difficulty, placing it into perspective according to what you personally can do to address it, and, what and when the local authorities can become involved. Plan and track your appointments and make a record of the detail provided, tests ordered, and results shared. You will only be able to clearly decide whether to stay with the health authority you are going to, or, ask for referral to, or choose, and alternate practitioner if you have a record of your experiences and their result. With CFS-ME, you can't depend upon your memory to remind you of or replay the content from your appointments.
Deny Urgencies.
This step can be extremely difficult for some of us to do, especially those who are more action oriented and tend to be committed to their passions ... which is often a correlation with those who acquire CFS-ME. For the optimum response to be gained in either getting a cleanup, or, fire crew to the site before the trash catches on fire, numerous kinds of attention arousing distractions may have to be denied. What are YOU willing to put on hold will depend partially on how Patient you can be, how well you can cope with Fear triggers, how aware you are of the history of the distraction, and, how much you WANT involvement with the alternative.
The underbrush is out THERE.
It may seem to be smoking, but the phone is ringing and IT always comes first. You have a concern about the underbrush after hearing about other fires recently, but, there is a deadline you feel you MUST make. It could be completing a Report for work. It could be finalizing the plans for a holiday for you and your lover, before the Special today's offer ends. It could be that you just received notice that a package of your favorite hobby supplies that you have been waiting for over the last 3 long months, has arrived. You want to pick it up NOW. Your relatives may be arriving soon and you just MUST get all of the laundry done, wash the floors and windows, and bake enough deserts to last a week of entertaining for twice the number in your family. One of the challenges may be the inner sense of urgency we feel. Another may be our timeliness in recalling the underbrush concern, AFTER, we have tended to all the apparent emergencies.
We had ordered a replacement furnace in early November of the previous year. Installation of it had initially been delayed until the late Spring (May) due to a winter which, unusually, arrived before mid-November, and remained constant throughout, until into June. The furnace engineer was prepared to install it during mid-May. We were away for medical and business reasons from mid-May to mid-June. By the time I returned in June, we learned that our furnace fellow had sustained severe heart problems in early May, while on a vacation, and had gone through open-heart surgery with multiple bypasses and a valve change. The installation had to wait for him and he could only supervise it then. We had a potential for being away again, for a longer period, September or October. We waited for his OK.
A pantry cabinet with a slide out section became available in later July. It had been on sale the previous February. We had kept a copy of the ad for we knew that the store would honor the special price if the unit was in stock later, and, we had the advert. The store had one unit left. They honored the price. They held it until we could arrange for its delivery by way of a neighbor's truck. It arrived in late July. With appointments and other commitments out of the way by mid-August, I opened the box and prepared to, and began assembly. After a number of hours of painting and preparing, I managed to get most of the unit together. A few severe problems were discovered that had to be addressed before completion.
I had kept in contact with the furnace provider and installer and he now confirmed an action date of a few days after my beginning the assembly for the cabinet. With constant weather adversities (great disadvantage to do the installation on a rainy or very hot day ... which we were having many of) and our possible commitments for September, it seemed best to proceed with the earliest day we could agree on. The Monday we were to begin, the assistant furnace tech who was to come and do most of the work, booked off sick. The earliest he could reschedule was the Friday. Our neighborly furnace engineer, who had sold us the replacement furnace, had assured me for many months that the transition could be done in 6 hours. Recently, he was increasingly assuring me that I could do most of the work involved. I had only planned to lightly assist. Now, I was being drawn into doing the heavy lifting. Difficult to say NO, and delay a week closer to our approaching absence.
I was involved in a major work commitment that absorbed as much of my time and energy between June and October as I allowed. ALL of the above was taking place during this period. A form of apparent reality, similar to this squeezing together of urgent and conflicting action commitments, is a common experience for people with CFS-ME. It was all very Real NOW and while most of my health had been returned for many months, it was a reminder of the many times earlier when a clear discernment between desired urgencies and health maintenance and recovery urgencies had to be made. Otherwise, opportunities would be lost, and health Recovery would be slowed, or even set back.
Endanger Opportunities.
If we fail to remain both Aggressive, and, Patient, our steps towards preventing a fire, building a cabinet to finished state, and recovering from CFS-ME, are likely to fail also. We are the persons who have the major interest, awareness, and, are depending on others to resolve, or assist in resolving these developing disasters. Doing OUR best does not mean that the same answers and tactics are Best, for everyone. I provide an personal example here. It is best if you can learn FROM it, not repeat it. A failure to become aware of the options involved can become a failure to avoid a disaster.
If YOU get off track or pay attention to every real and apparent urgency, you WILL lose opportunities, and, a catastrophe may result. For the person who is aware of the building underbrush, not DOING something to resolve the concern is likely to result in a fire which could have been avoided and lessened. While you are attending to the Personal Desires and Fears in your life, you are posting a "Pending" sign on the dangers which may destroy the security, safety, and health of yourself and your neighbourhood.
To the extent that "I" got off track, some opportunities were lost; others were chosen. The TIMING was tight if I was going to be involved in each of the commitments throughout the period. WHY I chose to become involved in the WORK of installing the furnace was a question of time, finances, weather, timing, and my own past demonstrated skills and ability to learn. The factors were similar for the Pantry Cabinet acquisition. Had I cancelled our planned trip in May-June, nothing would have changed for the installation of the furnace. Our furnace man would still have had the critical health setbacks, and, we would have lost ALL of many benefits we acquired during our trip. Assembly of the cabinet could have been delayed. It's purchase might even have been cancelled.
Timing, as you have read about elsewhere, can be critical for those with CFS-ME. If you get all occupied with what you MAY have, you may waste all of your Time, Resources, and Credibility on irrelevant options and with incompetent people. THAT is a Disaster! You may become hopeful listening to someone who only is concerned about their sale. What they are selling may assist many others, yet not you. Others may be passionate about some form of therapy, or, protocol, or, supplementation .... It may be a benefit for you now, later, with varying durations of different intensities, in bursts, or never. This, and other pages here, will encourage you to
Stay on Track, and, Be Patient.
Most of all, they will encourage your Doing.
Abandon Limits.
We are at a turning point.
We have to choose HOW we are going to go ahead.
How much are we going to GIVE?
How far are we going to GO?
Yes, the underbrush is still there.
We have mentioned it by phone to the forestry department.
The person we spoke to said they had been looking into it.
Did I ask what they had decided or were planning to do?
NO. What do I know about it. I am not an expert.
Do I care WHAT action they are going to take?
Yet if no one ever asks them "WHAT", is there a Plan?
Do we have a record of their receiving my concern?
Is there any person-by-name who is responsible?
I did my part. Now I will leave it to THEM.
OK, I managed to get the cabinet partly together.
Why don't I just ask a neighbor over to see if they know.
Wait, I did have a neighbor over. He didn't see anything.
There are no cupboard specialists nearby.
One needs familiarity and expertise to go further.
I can spend a lot of time frustrating them and myself.
I HAVE checked and tried many options; now to tell them.
Someone with no more experience than I, is better?
And, to pay someone would dash away any discount savings.
I could phone Customer/Technical Service.
I made a Choice to Recover from CFS-ME.
How far am I expected to go, and go, and go?
I ask my doctor, who says:
"Don't worry, take a pill, see me in two weeks."
I ask my health facilitator, who said they could help ..
I have had only short improvements and setbacks.
I can't go on like this.
I don't know when?
I don't know how?
Someone else will find the way for me.
No, they won't.
Sacrifice.
We are at a turning point.
We have to choose whether to accept the rising difficulties and work onward in spite of them, or, by removing them, OR, to give up and back away. It is always easier to just walk away. Unless, we consider what will eventually happen as a result of this retreat. Unless, we consider what CAN happen, if we stay the course.
With the accumulating underbrush, we know from ecological history that at some time, either a lightning strike, or, a careless human action WILL start a fire. The degree of catastrophe resulting from that fire will depend upon how soon it is discovered, how remote from help it is located, how recent there has been a drenching rainfall or snowfall, how hot and dry the climate has been during the previous 4 months, and, how fast and constant the wind is. Each of these factors can ADD to the danger of the fire. Had we persisted in our expressions of concern, and, had there been action taken to lessen the underbrush, ALL of these factors would now be less influential. Any resulting damages would have been much more reduced. OUR sacrifice is to devote some time and energy to what is a benefit for the environment which we and our neighbors SHARE. It is an ability to think beyond ourselves.
With the partially completed cabinet, which requires replacement parts, returning it to the store WILL be difficult. It would have to be dismantled, repackaged, reshipped, returned. Even if the store received it back, it would require much time, effort, and loss, to return to a ZERO or starting point. As I would find later, there would never be another opportunity to purchase this style of cabinet, at the price we paid for it. This was the last unit in the store. The manufacturer had ceased to make this model. There would be more searching of the stores and flyers. At some later point, likely during the winter, we would find a suitable replacement. It would require shipment to us. We could take other precautionary steps before buying it. Similar problems of defective parts would NOT be discovered until, once again, the unit was partially completed. Then, we might be back to this step and decision AGAIN.
We are part of the way through our Recovery from CFS-ME.
We have been making an effort. We are hoping it is not in vain.
If we don't have a clue of what we are doing, we haven't read this Package!
That IS our Choice. If we don't understand what we have, we are lost.
If we don't know what can be done to improve our health, we have abandoned ourselves. THAT is the sacrifice. We have to make the effort and have the confidence that we can and will find the ways to cope with, and Recover from, this Package of Illnesses. If we are going to wait for medicine to find a magic cure, we are beaten. If we are going to wait until the government provides recognition and support, we are delusional. Yet, without that sacrifice of joining-in, we have chosen to go nowhere.
You have to ACT Fast and Constructively if you are going to recognize that a Fire is building and either limit its spread, stop it, redirect it, or, shelter what could be destroyed by it. If you are too slow or indecisive, or, just wrong ... other factors beyond you may make decisions for you and make your life more troublesome. For someone with CFS-ME, the longer it takes you to have it diagnosed, the longer it takes you to understand it, the longer it takes you to find others you can work with, and, the longer it takes you to begin a Relevant strategy towards Recovery, the more you are likely to lose control over the remainder of your life.
4. Windstorm.
It is easy to get caught up and blown along in a windstorm.
The wind begins to build in presence, volume, and force.
We think that it will only be small and soon leave, as it came.
While we occupy ourselves with our lifestyle concerns, the winds grow stronger. Soon, it is the wind which is deciding HOW, WHEN, and WHERE we are spending our efforts and time. Our lifestyle is interrupted. Again, and again, and again! Everything would have been less urgent and intrusive if we had begun to take shelter earlier.
The more that I did to improve on what I had received, the more difficult I made it to decide to return it. The improvements could not be made efficiently nor effectively AFTER the cabinet was fully assembled. In some ways, the cabinet could nether be put together, then disassembled to add on the modifications, before a final build. There were a few basic choices and procedures which could have been done as a matter of insurance. These were not done because of the experience of consistency which gave me Confidence. All of this Apparent Reality was of the Past, not the Present. So often, we want to save time, energy, effort, cost ... by the RISK of impatience, and optimism.
Confirmation can reduce Assumption.
Reducing assumption, reduces Risk.
Reducing Risk, increases Success.
- Confirm the Parts List.
- Confirm the Tools required.
- Confirm Service Availability.
- Confirm Warehouse Supply.
- Confirm Shipment Dates.
Confirm the Parts List.
Every person who has been involved in design, construction, cabinetry, cooking, painting, fishing ... KNOWS that if you want to have the easiest, fastest, quality outcome ... you make sure to begin with all of the ingredients. If you don't know WHAT you are going to build, and WHERE, how can you design it? If you don't have the nails and bolts that you plan to fasten the lumber together with,
everything you put up, will fall down. How can you bake a cake if you have no flour? You might have your paints and brushes, yet, with no canvas, paper, or wallboard ... where are you going to paint? Worst of all, perhaps, you might fish all week long, in excellent weather, and never catch ONE fish, because you are fishing in a dead lake. If we have no idea what we will be working with before we reach the location, we are risking failure.
I had assembled a number of furniture items during the previous 2 years. Many years earlier, I had been in a job of repair and installation. I always ensured that I went to the work site with as complete an inventory of replacement parts as I could gather. When I designed, I carefully drew everything to scale on paper and tabulated how many pieces of what material I would need. Before starting ANY job, I would ensure I had all of the supplies, parts, ingredients necessary to complete it. It took a familiarity with the project. I had training. I had done something similar previously. I had experience. I had built on failures, into a success mode. It involved thinking ahead. It involved having some extra materials at hand for unexpected irregularities, errors, and breakages ... few as they were. If I were cooking, I would set out all of my ingredients before starting, a visual plan. There had been a change.
My more recent experiences had been consistent.
Assembly furniture projects, for me, had become predictable.
I would unpack the shipping container and set everything out.
I would make a few quality "adjustments" for health benefits.
I would follow the lengthy instructions, often using over 100 pieces.
There would be 1 or 2 poorly described instructions to wrestle with.
After some re-interpretation, everything would be back on track.
Everything would be completed, often in 50% more time than expected.
And with CFS-ME, that was already 4 times longer than if healthy.
Sometimes, several non-essential parts would be missing, and be ordered.
Done, and in use, within a few days.
I opened the package.
I removed the parts and grouped them.
I elected to paint/finish/seal the unfinished parts.
I began assembly with a degree of rush and distraction.
Rushed by my desire to continue my work pending completion.
Distracted by the lagging furnace schedule and cold weather.
I added support brackets to make the unit stronger, stable.
Some fasteners previously made of metal, were now plastic.
Some of the screw heads were of an unusual shape & size.
A windstorm of aggravation was building.
A LOT of time & frustration could have been avoided.
If I had only checked the parts list, before beginning.
Largely together, I had a friend help me try the slide-in.
The rails worked in the slides, yet, never all the way in.
They would not work, regardless of obvious adjustments.
And, there were NO hinges for the door.
And, no nails (60) to attach the back.
I found replacement nails from my supplies.
Hinges, nails, and rail/slide sets were ordered.
The wind was calmed, for the moment.
CFS-ME had altered HOW I did some things, and it may you also.
For almost 6 years, I had been mildly to severely brain fogged, a lot.
It was all I could do to keep in my consciousness what I was doing next.
Every thought, plan, action, was based on doing part 1, then part 2.
There was seldom any flow of being able to plan a series of steps.
Nothing like, doing steps 1 through 10, then steps A through H.
Such protocols, procedures, instructions, and diagnostics .. gone.
I had learned to be content to simply ASK, for Spiritual Guidance.
I seldom knew where I was headed, except, towards Recovery.
Now, I was struggling back into the material world.
I HAD been seriously ill earlier in life.
I had experienced many forms of acute illness.
Each had been different. Some considered terminal.
I had recovered from EACH of those and grown confident.
With CFS-ME, I did what had saved my life many times.
I focused on singular health problems, and, failed this time.
The wind was building. An umbrella was going to be useless.
I had to find out what ALL the parts were, before gaining.
Working with only some of the parts, resulted in no fit.
You cannot bake bread if someone describes it as a pie.
Take the time and make the effort.
Find out WHICH and How Many illnesses you have.
Know WHAT you are working with.
Don't Assume.
Pause.
Confirm the Tools required.
Doing much with wood without a hammer or saw, is difficult.
Designing with no pencil or ruler or paper won't get one far.
Cooking with no oils or spices is likely to yield a bland product.
Fishing without any hooks could be a lengthy endeavor.
If you want to change the landscape, you will have to take some Action.
If you don't interact WITH the landscape, nothing will change.
I was putting together the pieces to make the pantry.
First, I cleared an area that would not be disturbed.
I spread out a drop cloth to contain possible paint drops.
It would also make cleaning up drill debris easier.
I brought out all the tools I expected to require.
I set out the saw horses and paint brush.
The instructions were at hand in a good light.
Now was the time to begin.
Know what tests can be helpful to a diagnosis.
Know how the tests are best used and interpreted.
Understand that symptoms are not diseases.
Singular symptoms may reflect many influences.
Understand the pieces of YOUR version of CFS-ME.
If you look for the forest, you will miss the trees.
If you look for the trees, you may miss the forest.
A forest of symptoms can hide the wind in confusion.
Singular symptoms will entice you with assumptions.
Tests only work when combined with Wisdom.
Confirm Service Availability.
We don't always know the particular about a service until we try to use it. We call up, and find that the office has just closed. It has taken us too long to get to this step, or, the office is working under a different, and earlier time zone. Yes, it DID happen. I phoned them about the cabinet parts when I got that far in the assembly. I was in the Pacific time zone. They were in the Easter (3 hours earlier) time zone. It was a Friday, late afternoon. They would reopen for business and service on the next Monday morning. I could visit their website for instructions and assembly videos. I did. The model I had was not listed anywhere and not available by their site search engine. No video. No details. Wrap it up and work at other things until Monday. Note the open times and the phone number, handy for Monday.
If you want a test ran, confirm the laboratory schedules for your region. Can your doctor even prescribe the tests? Can your therapist take payment and send it to a lab? Some tests are only examined by a few labs in the country. They may be closed at the weekend. They may be in another time zone. The test may have to be sent by special courier and arrive during the day, within several days. That could determine when it is best for you to participate in the test (i.e. give your sample). Also be aware that some doctors see no patients on the weekends. Others only see hospital emergencies on Fridays while they are making their hospital rounds. Some doctors by be absent for 2 weeks, numerous times during the year. Therapist or doctor, don't be surprised by a waiting list. Plan to book a few appointments ahead. With CFS-ME, you may have to miss an appointment because you can't get out of bed then.
Don't be annoyed, Just Plan.
Confirmation puts the wind in your sails.
Now, you can begin to move.
Confirm Warehouse Supply.
Seldom do you have the opportunity to speak with the shipper.
Customer Service, Sales, and others often speak for them.
I spoke to Customer Service. I needed replacement parts.
They were made note of together with my address, Phone #.
Expect to wait two weeks of business days ... 10 to 14 days.
The time goes by. No shipment or shipping notice, yet.
I phoned to query. Customer Service excuses.
Warehouse out of inventory; resupply date unknown.
Confirm Shipment Dates.
More weeks pass. No shipment, or, delivery.
Phoned again. Would Customer Service check with Shipping?
Parts to be in in several days, the Inventory clerk confirms.
Several weeks later, the parts are finally received.
Hard not to rush when you are Confident, and, challenged.
With CFS-ME, it may seem that you are challenged in EVERY part of your life continuously. Even for those with full health, there are so many options and opportunities available today, that it is difficult to have the self esteem, patience, and, awareness ... to STOP, and CONFIRM. Are we doing what is best to get where we want to go. If we WERE doing our best last week, yesterday, an hour ago ... are we Continuing to do our best?
5. Calling for Help!
Now your limit and call for help when you WANT, or NEED, some new options, or, assistance to get to a positive outcome.
Know the Drill.
- When to Call.
- Detail to have.
- Show Respect.
- Make Notes.
- Set a Date.
When to Call.
Detail to have.
Show Respect.
Make Notes.
Set a Date.
Build a Relationship.
If you make an effort to build an association with the other person, you have a starting point of familiarity, and respect to begin from if there is a next contact requirement. When you call again, you will know their name and they will know yours. You will have a memory for their idiosyncrasies. Those differences which make them unique. Good or bad, those differences will not likely change. If you want THEIR help, you will acknowledge THEIR concerns and fears, while controlling your own insecurities and intolerances. If you are starting anew on each visit, progress will be slow. Success will be in jeopardy.
6. Rain, Snow, Ice -- Traffic.
The modern economic and customer service climate is one of bad weather and heavy traffic.
Know the Climate.
- Holidays & Vacations.
- Distraction Days.
- Bad Weather Days.
- Confusion Days.
- Sick Days.
- Down Days.
Holidays & Vacations.
Distraction Days.
Bad Weather Days.
Confusion Days.
Sick Days.
Down Days.
7. Cutting off the Fuel.
Taking a BREAK from the Fuel can be a very positive and constructive contribution to your health maintenance and Recovery. At some point, you are best served by removing some of the energy leakages.
Accept the Climate.
- Ask and Listen.
- Run and Pause.
- Expand the View.
Ask and Listen.
Run and Pause.
Expand the View.
8. Redesign - Rebuild.
-
Replacement of a defective slide.
Found 1 outside slide component had a raised ball bearing cover at one end. This prevented the slide from completing the last 8 inches of travel during a closure. The slide worked perfectly when put together and operated out of the cabinet, or, when the internal part of the slide, not attached to a support, was slid through the external rails, attached to the cabinet side. Once the slide components were mounted on the internal part of the pantry side, and, the external part of the slide-in shelf unit, it failed to work. Replacement of this slide, enabled the shelf unit to slide fully into the cabinet, a little further than before. Full insertion was only possible after part 2 and 3 were completed.
-
Replacement of a constant failing rail.
Found the inward ends TWO of the FOUR rails, which attach to the sides of the slide-in shelf unit, to be defective/bent/unbent. The difference between a working and failing component was found to be 1/32nd of an inch. This difference impeded the travel of the shelf rail through the outside slide component, which would be mounted on the side of the cabinet.
The failure to completely slide closed ONLY happened when BOTH components were attached to their wood support surfaces and full inward movement was attempted. At that point, the slide-in shelf unit would not travel the final 8 inches to close. It was impossible to determine which of the 4 slides was failing as all 4 were suspended once the rails were in the slides, and, there was no visual access behind the slide-in shelf unit, where the problem was occurring.
The rails which worked properly had slight bends in the ends of the rail, down from the top, and, up from the bottom. These could facilitate the entry of the rail into the slide, and possibly prevent catching upon the upper and lower nestings of ball bearings. The defective rails had less of a bend in the end of the upper and lower channels and were one, or both, more straight than the working ones. These also DID work in some of the FOUR positions yet not in others.
-
A Confident Push:
Completing the last 1/2 inch (centimeter) of travel for the slide-in shelf unit was only possible after the upper outside part of the front of the slide-out was given an even forceful push. To ensure that this would remain free once the shelves were loaded, the unit was ran inward and outward about 20 times, as a test.
Following completion of these 3 modifications, the Pantry Cupboard with slide-in/out section was ready for use and returned to health.
12.0 hours: Time spent from purchase of the unit until full working of it.
This included painting the 20% of unpainted composite outgasing wood, applying 6 small angle iron supports, waiting for the arrival of missing parts: 3 hinges, 60 nails, and 2 plastic door stops, PLUS, 2 rail/slide component sets (separate shipment), including delay because warehouse was out of stock (30 days), including delay due to immediate urgency of other work (6 days).
45 days: Time to completion
1-1/2 hours: Time which would reasonably, by previous experience, be taken to assemble and put into service a similar item purchased TWO years earlier. Transportation from store to home is not included.
01 day: Time to completion.
FEAR of CONFLICT
Fear of Violence
Fear of killing
Fear of nothingness
|
CONFIDENCE in NEGOTIATION
Ability to be Calm
Ability to Help Others
Ability to Get Guidance
|
|
