Masturbation and LUST
Which is the Problem ?
John R. Sennett
I have a problem with masturbation.
I've been entangling this mental/emotional illness for 9 years now. I've sought for solutions from many places people ie schools, friends, clergy, mentors, lecturers, etc. So now, i've decided to search for some useful assistance or control measures from (you) on how to QUIT this unworthy act.
This bad habit has affected me in so many ways:
Physical weakness, mental inalertness, lack of enthusiasm', social activity, appetite, self control {specially that of sexual appetite; anger/sadness, etc. This sex urge seems to be so powerful that sometimes i can't concentrate while i read my books. I don't know how to control it enough. I've tried some means to stop it. But these means haven't easy to put up with.
Your question, as I understand it, concerns LUST, more than it concerns Masturbation.
Look for an understanding here as much as a solution.
There are numerous options with some much more constructive than others, cheaper than others, and more available than others. Some involve more participation on your part than others. Persons who give you short answers with singular options are more interested in judging, controlling, and condeming you than in sincerely assisting you. Understanding and accepting yourself and working with God to try and balance the many negative influences we humans have magnified in our experience will be more productive than trying to take responsibility for what is not yours or trying to place blame and avoid the responsibility which IS ours.
Masturbation was a normal act of healthy adult males for the tens of thousands of years of human history before the early 1900's in the U.S.A. Well intentioned social leaders of that time, on a basis of personal trauma, destructive authoritarian imprinting and religious hypocracy ... created the myth of masturbation as a personal activity capable of turning a person, physically-emotionally-spiritually into a demon of uncontrollable, selfish, and violent passion.
In reality, this was the result of a terror experienced by intolerant and ignorant intellectualists who witnessed the sexual acting out behaviors of a few mentally ill individuals. This particular form of mental illness is often a result of the presence of not less than 5 High Intensity Energy Blocks which the individual has acquired, usually in their own lifetime, from severally traumatic experiences. Generally, such persons continue to be institutionalized to this day (2005) because of the unawareness of Spiritually Guided Balancing Therapy, which IS capable of releasing these obsessional behaviors, and, a lack of compassion and understanding by society in general, and, social and religious leaders, in particular.
Several basic concepts must be described and defined first or we have no foundation for communicating about this issue, its variables, and how and when it can and would be constructive to influence them.
HORMONES:
In the human species, there is a constant production of well over 100 hormones in the male and female body. These hormones provide the basis for the activation, regulation, and relaxation of all of the life processes which keep the body alive and healthy. The relative and ever changing Dominance of any of these hormones in the current activity of the person is usually a function of nutrition, overall health, awareness and perception of their physical and social environment, education, imprinting, energy blocks presenting at the time, and, spiritual strength.
A Few of these many hormones control and enable the sexual functions of humans and these same few often influence, and are influenced by, other related functions ranging from immunity, attitude, mental distraction/intelligence, sensitivity, body temperature, and digestion. Affecting one part of this package, affects ALL of the package. Most hormones are produced in complex families of cells called organs and are communicated to ALL of the other organs and cells in the person by way of the blood circulation system, and, nerve pathways.
An imbalance of hormonal presence is a destructive pattern of reactivity which places excessive demands upon the organs of production and threatens to damage the cells involved, through exhaustion and deterioration, sometimes towards a position of permanent failure. Adrenal glands, the thyroid, a pancreas, one's liver, the testes, and other glands may deteriorate through constant or sudden, and excessive demands, to a point of temporary or permanent failure. The male testes, or gonads are one set of hormone producing glands which can fail without threatening the life of the individual. Most other hormone sources in the human, DO threaten the general physical and emotional health of the individual and can quickly present a challenge to life.
The factors which most often influence the destructive overuse of hormones include compulsive and obsessional behavior inducing energy blocks, extreme physical duress and injury, socially educated imprinting that demands intense and inflexible responses, and, rarely, severe reactions to toxic chemicals and powerful drugs. Human cultures have demonstrated a persistent pattern of imposing demands on their members which exceed healthy performance of activities ... usually so the Power of the individual can be manipulated by the lust for control and security which motivates their leaders.
Most individuals from civilized cultures die from intolerances which they act out to abuse themselves and others. Irrelevant health care, overwork, destructive communication patterns, toxic environments, endemic depression and anxiety, and fragile intimate and social relationships are seldom present in truly open, sharing, and self-sufficient non-civilized groups. We have created a commercial and economically dependent civilization in which material worship is often the focus of one's activities. This focus encourages envy, which increasingly leeds to lust.
LIBIDO
This is a term used to indicate the intensity and frequency of sexual desire experienced by an individual. There is no context of a healthy AVERAGE of sexual performance for humans. A great many factors can influence the day to day level of this desire beyond a level of balance which is healthful for the individual and their physiology. This Balance may differ from what can be loosly considered a healthy emotional balance for an individual.
The level of libido which is normal (regular, constant, healthful) for one person may be an extreme and most unhealthful for another. A lack of awareness of this natural range of personal differences often encourages interpersonal misunderstandings, particularly in the area of intimacy. Gender sexual performance expectations, promoted within a culture, tend towards the irrelevant in direct parallel to the amount of accurate information about sexuality shared openly between the members, and, the amount of deceptive and manipulative information imposed on members for the purpose of encouraging their financial participation in and subservience to addictive expectations and attitudes.
Individual libido levels are often increased by a culture sanctioning the following:
- Billions of dollars of sexually suggestive advertisements.
- Persistent associations between pleasure and sexuality.
- An avoidance of an appreciation for other forms of pleasure.
- A dominant judgement that image, quantity, size are determinants of power.
- A media focus on Power enabling one to get whatever one wants.
- Common clothing fashions which accentuate the sensual by revealing most.
- Peer group membership according to constant verbal sexual expressiveness.
- A denial of, and thus encouragement of family and peer sexual abuse.
- A denial of and thus encouragement of institutionalized sexual abuse.
Individual libido levels are often diminished by a culture encouraging:
- Intergender miscommunication through restricted gender roles.
- Over-competitiveness leading to overwork and chronic fear/anxiety.
- Irresponsible involvement in sexual activity for purely selfish reasons.
- The building and maintaining of energy blocks through political distraction.
- Diminished quality of relationships through irrelevant time and financial standards.
- An avoidance of honesty, openness, respectfulness, self-discipline, sharing.
- Totalitarian, mechanical, statistical reverence for power and authority.
- Systemic disease toxicity of the body through scientific incompetence.
- A reliance on the perception that a manipulative fix is better than a wise response.
An exaggerated paradox is often the result of our cultural efforts.
We often hypersensitize the libido of individuals while presenting a real environment which frustrates it. Constant frustration tends to lead to apathy, or, aggressiveness. Either one accepts the environment and allows the environment to determine the nature of their involvement, or, they react and assert their Will to modify the environment to match their desires.
Expressed differently, the individual seeks to fulfill desires which have been educated into them and imposed upon them, or, they accept the implicit deception of the social system in which they participate and become numbed out of involvement by the seemingly inevitable failure expected. The extremes within this hypocritical system suggest that it is better to have never loved than to have desired and lost, lost, lost! The apparent strong willed and fully brainwashed individual believes that the fantasy IS real and that if they simply focus on it enough and try hard enough, with force of mind and brute of strength, they will be rewarded with the gift of acceptance and pleasure promised by the social fantasy that dominates their consciousness.
The healthy person has no or few energy blocks, is self-aware, self-disciplined, reverent, open, honest, sharing, and chooses their directions and involvements with a freedom of respect and negotiation. Regardless of the degree of their libido, they choose to share rather than to impose, or, to sacrifice. When mutual agreement is not consensual on participation, they appreciate that they can manage their own needs for physical pleasure through responsible masturbation. We have, unfortunately, created a world in which, increasingly, there are fewer and fewer persons who are healthy in body, mind, and spirit with the result that there are becoming fewer and fewer who have healthy interpersonal and personal sexual expressiveness.
LUST
When the hormonal health of an individual is frustrated by the paradoxical enhancement and suppression of their libido, the only outcome can be multilevel disharmony and frustration. Ill health in one's body or in relationships is an expected outcome.
Lust is defined here as a compulsive obsessive attitude and behavior which expresses a choice in the form of a powerful dependency and demand. Humans generally experience a greater need for NORMAL behaviors and resources which have been withheld from them, either by circumstance, or, by intentional denial and abuse.
People who have traumatic experiences of abandonment and rejection and built energy blocks from them tend to be overly sensitive to these feelings. They feel rejection and abandonment before it happens and even from others who are not doing anything to merit the judgement and reaction. There is such a NEED to be loved and acknowledged that the person accentuates the risk involved and often sabotages the environment by encouraging those present to become defensive against their imposing and suspicious of their manipulation. The blocked person experiences more of what they fear, and their fears are reinforced by the negative experiences they unwittingly contrive.
Lust within another person is not too difficult for many people to see. The lustful person acts with an image of dreamy fantasy and glazed eyes, as if watching a picture of what they most desperately want. They may even betray their irrelevant feelings by salivating, confusing their language, becoming self distracted, acting out loudly, or, becoming overly shy. Their need for success at possession and control of another person, a new dress or car, a position of authority, an exquisite meal, or an entertainment extravaganza prepared just for themselves .... is conveyed in that person who seems to participate in their activities with overconfidence, aloofness, and naievity.
Disappointment arises when the reality crashes.
Other people are actually inolved in their dream reality and those other people may not treat them like the god they would like to be. Lust can quickly develop into Rage. Failure, where only success could be seen, often results in the self-centred person continuing to avoid responsibility for their choices and actions by finding someone else to blame for their misfortune of a broken dream. It is always easier to complain about life or the opposite gender, victimize oneself or one's idol, excuse one's own contribution to the outcomes, or, wish vengeance on the idol which seems to intentionally NOT cooperate with one's projections or demands.
Envy is Lust in a milder presentation.
With envy, there is the lack of responsibility that holds that what someone else has, by virture of the hard work of themselves, or others whom they have been knowingly or unknowingly associated with, should also be one's own, except, without the sacrifice, networking or coincidence of timing and presence involved for the original person in the fantasy image. It also arises from having had experiences which one has become familiar with and dependent upon and then being exposed to other cultures, environments, health levels, or financial differences ... which induce, or suggest, an increased level of frustration and sacrifice. Woe is me, the Past was better!
Envy is an attitude of materially living in the Past, or in a Future based upon unrealistic expectations. There is an inability to acknowledge all of the non-personal and interpersonal factors involved in the evolvement of one's life. Without this acknowledgement and awareness, there can only be a continual disatisfaction with what has CHANGED from the Past and what has not BECOME the Present out of a godlike projection of the Future. It is humbling to accept that life is largely not a predictable outrcome of our efforts and not a desired reward of our wants.
Envious people are proud.
They WANT the best and easiest of everything while assuming that others who do not have this BEST are somehow inferior. When THEY are subjected to the sometimes challenging and discomforting reality of an Earth which is larger than they are, and, a society composed of REAL people and not just others who are slaves and robots to their desires, the envious person becomes depressed. Rather than seeking to resolve the confusion and disappointment which induced the depressive feelings, they seek for quick fixes to force happiness into their lives. What can they buy or acquire to distract them from coping with REAL life?
Lust as an element of a culture becomes much more difficult to be aware of, if, you are a member of that culture. Persons from other cultures often easily detect the signs of cultural Lust and may assume personal adoption of such attitudes of Lust in their desire to be accepted as a member of the Lustful culture and a possible recipient of the dreams of power, pleasure and sloth which that culture appears to live out and flaunt on others.
REMEDIES for LUST (including excessive masturbation/sexual activity)
1. RELEASE of energy blocks.
These may have been inherited and/or acquired within one's own lifetime.
This source accounts for as much as 78% of all exaggerated behaviors and overly rigid and abusive behaviors. Knowing you have these and understanding them can afford you greater compassion towards yourself. If you do not have the means or availability to utilize an effective therapy to release these, the most constructive way of coping with them is to acknowledge them and seek to build an environment and lifestyle which does not stimulate them or deny them. The harder you resist the pattern, the stronger you will make it ... by giving it energy to work with.
Energy blocks are always created from a traumatic experience, real or perceived to be real, by the person carrying them. In the issue of lust and envy, abandonment and rejection induced energy blocks have usually been formed. These can create intense insecurities which are never felt to have been balanced no matter how much material wealth or power one acquires. Millionaires have died in misery. Political leaders have disgraced themselves while attempting to be intimately accepted by strangers seeking to manipulate them for their own pleasure. Military and security enforcement leaders have tortured and massacred innocent people in order to feel powerful and godlike. Mothers and fathers have created dictators seeking to avenge their abuse onto others. For the obsessed, there is never enough of what they seek to erase what they fear.
2. MODIFICATION of one's environment.
Destructive, disrespectful, abusive, and authoritarian patterns in your environment will continually encourage and imprint you with attitudes which suggest to you that it is acceptable to manipulate and deceive others to fulfill your needs, or, that it is sanctioned for you to impose on and force others to make you happy. These influences will only continue to assist you in sabotaging your energies and resulting in a failure of your actions in achieving the peace that comes from interactions which are both sharing, voluntary, and appreciative.
Know the difference between Pornography and Mentoring.
Particularly in the print world and now in the Internet world, that which is published and available is often assumed to be correct and valid. There is an assumption that if the information available was incorrect, no one would reference it and it would not be economically viable to host, maintain, and make a lot of money from. Much money has been made from many deceptions in the past which in the outcome led to pain, misery, torture, and death of millions of people. Ignorance seeks a direction. The wanderer and the confused seek security. It is easy for the ignorant to be deceived and enslaved. It is easy for the confused to be encouraged to accept a fantasy rather than the reality of choice. Easy is not always the most constructive strategy.
Mentoring provides you with relevant information that helps you to understand yourself and others such that you can accept and work with what you have and not feel that you are, or have, lost out on important experiences. Mentoring encourages you to explore the possibilities and to set personal standards based on the degree of risk and reward available. Mentoring advises you of why, when, how, and why certain decisions and options have a tendency to be successful and constructive while others tend to be destructive regardless of degree of success, or failure. Mentoring encourages you to grow in awareness and self-direction so that you can participate with confidence and benefit in the real world. Mentoring assists you in determining what is relevant for you, yet respectful of others. Mentoring helps you find and experience Joy. It is all about appreciating life.
Pornography provides you with illusions and fantasies of reward without commitment and respect in return for abuse and force. Pornography encourages you to think only of yourself and how you can deceive and manipulate others to obey and revere your power. Pornography builds on your feelings of insecurity and lack of joining in and suggests that you can participate without presence and avoid rejection by forgoing acceptance. Pornography promises love, intimacy, acceptance, power, wealth, physical pleasure, yet, it keeps you from participation, prevents you from sharing, denies your value by including you in a membership which values a lack of restriant and and a glorification of excess. Pornography suggests that there are no limits, that you can't fail, and that respect is for those who take control of others. Pornography confuses stimulation with joy and love with deception. It is all about depreciating others and minimizing one's confidence in interacting with others by maximizing one's desires into the Lust of need.
The difference between pornography and mentoring is that one rejoices in interacting with reality while the other rejoices in interacting with fantasy.
One promises you the knowledge and skills to interact with confidence, consideration, and compassion. The other leaves you ignorant, minimizes skill development, and encourages you to remain, or return to a self-centred and juvenile level of emotional expression. The one encourages you to grow into a sharing adult. The other encourages you to remain a child or fall into senility. It is NOT about nudity or explicit sexual expression. The difference is about HOW that expression takes place and WHY the participants are interacting. One is only about someone always Taking and others always Giving to them. The other is about Sharing, by Choice, to the degree which each is joyful about.
REMOVE or AVOID ALL stimulating influences from your surroundings and replace them with activities which enable you to develop skills, enjoy a hobby, develop patience and empathy. Consider doing some volunteer work to modify your focus from only being on yourself, or, only being on what others have. If certain persons or groups encourage you directly, or by their example, to focus on and imitate the actions central to your lustful behavior, choose to avoid them and to first determine what kind of person you would like to be remembered as, and then, secondly which persons demonstrate those traits and how can you participate with them.
3. RISKS and Hazards:
Become aware of the hazards of lustful behaviors, and yours, in particular. Overactivity in physical pursuits, including masturabation and sexual involvement, can result in temporary or permanent injury which prevents further involvement. Such injuries to the male may result in impotence and an inability to get an erection ... even when mentally stimulated.
Deep knee bend exercise will result in you wearing out your knee joints more quickly and this will eliminate you from participating in sports and activities which require running, or even walking. Erratic and excessive exercise can also result in severe physical imbalances which can lead to heart attack, stroke, rupture, hernia, cancer, or tendon and ligament tears.
Stealing in order to accelertate one's acquisition of material riches, is likely to result in a prison term --- which will taint your employment and work record and disqualify you from some fields such that your future ability to increase your earnings above a low average are reduced. It can also result in the thrill and adventure of being shot, beaten, or killed.
The unrestricted use of force against others increases your risk of receiving equally or more powerful defensive AND enraged force directed back at you ... which could become life threatening. If you cannot control your limits, they WILL lead to others controlling you.
4. STIMULANTS including intoxicants, drugs, and spices (which can include aphrodisiacs) can accentuate your desires from wants into NEEDS and from attraction into LUST. If you are having difficulty in maintaining healthful limits and a respect for yourself and others, this may be one way for you to lower the pressure to perform. If these involvements become a preocupation such that they have you delaying or changing other plans in order to pursue these, you are often in the grip of substance abuse ... which is often the result of the presence and control of you by energy blocks.
Release the blocks or find constructive behaviors which demand focus and energy for participation and are often of low cost ... and have them available at all times. Fill the vacuum of inactivity and the anxiety and impatience producing suggestion of abandonment and rejection with activities which demand your attention. These options are best if they are low stress and can be participated in freely and easily without special preparation. Some examples include kniting, writing, walking, singing, tai chi, meditation, asking for Spiritual Guidance.
5. REALITY TESTING:
Spurious, superstitious, and magical associations are common forms of rationalization to allay fears and confusions amongst those who have yet to develop better discernment and confidence. Do YOU know the truth about the activities you most often engage in yet from which you usually emerge as a loser? IF you know the truth, why are you still choosing to participate?
An addiction is present when a person continues to participate in an activity which consistently disadvantages them, of which they are aware, and want to stop, yet cannot. A lust occurs when a person is aware of the negative consequences possible through their actions, yet denies that these consequences will ever be realized for themselves.
The lustful person is only aware of the "advertised" benefits that have been aggressively promoted to them through the mass media, through the encouraging words of friends and relatives, and through the NEED for the fantasy Reward. The Reward becomes so dominant that the potential sacrifice falls below significance.
Do you know the reality of the facts available?
If participants in lotteries and gaming KNEW that 90% of them would lose their money, would they continue to invest? If the style driven purchaser KNEW that the new dress, suit, hairstyle, car, or industry that they had just bought themselves into was going to die in a matter of months or a year or two, would they make the sacrifice?
If the sexually lustful person were to realize that ALL of those he or she lusted for would hate them for their demostrated insensitivity and self-centeredness, would the attraction be as great? Reality takes the certain and the uncertain out of the equation of life and leave the remainder of the possible. That leaves options with varying degrees of Risk. With pacing and negotiation, one can find, with far greater certainty, what they desire.
6. CUTTING AWAY the possibility:
Physical alteration to remove capability for involvement is a drastic and often irreversible option for moderating and managing a lustful behavior and attitude. In Saudi Arabia, a thief has his hands severed. In the Church of Latter Day Saints (Mormons), the person who gossips about others loses their membership in the community. In the Catholic Church of the near past, divorced persons were excommunicated. Many kinds of professionals are restricted from further practicing their profession by the associations which regulate them, if they have been found to be dishonest with their clients. Military personnel are jailed for failing to respect and follow the orders of their leaders. In each of these cases, the offending actions are assumed to have been engaged in by choice and with the awareness of penalty.
Sexually obsessive persons seldom develop from genetic hormonal irregularities, but such CAN happen. Other options mentioned here may also not be available and one's behavior may be endangering the health and safety of oneself or others. Removal of the male testes effectively removes the production of testosterone within the male and diminishes the expression of one's libido, and of one's aggressiveness (self-directed activity). Sexual expression is a normal extension of the accumulation of seminal fluid within the seminal vesicles. When these are full, tension develops through the inflammed-like stretching of the walls of the reservoir and one increasingly feels the desire to release this pressure. Often the physical nature of this sense is more unconscious than conscious.
Evidence of this pattern of accumulation and release is demonstrated by the fact that males have nocturnal emissions at which times their seminal vesicles are emptied by their Reptilian Structure, while they sleep. Abdominal tension, which may accompany this congestion of the vesicles, may also produce constipation ... which in turn through the straining to go to the bathroom through conscious exertion of pressure on the colon ... can lead to an equally cleansing evacuation of seminal fluid carried out with urine.
One can avoid BOTH of these unplanned releases and much of the abdominal tension ... which can induce anxiety and irritability, by observing the normal patterns of accumulation and release in one's personal system and timing masturbation acts to predate those times.
TOXIC SHAME in huge, abusive, and needless amounts can traumatize sensitive persons who find themselves unable to cease the cycle of accumulation and release and are unprepared for participation in an intimate relationship. Denial of masturbation AND the imposition of intentional fear producing beliefs for the sake of manipulation and control of others often leads to considerable sensitivity to the development of lust. Coupled with the shame and guilt of participation in masturbation, the contrived obsessional behavior encourages self hatred and hatred of the source of attraction. Removal of the seminal fluid producing cells will reduce the presence of desire as well as the imbalance of Need.
Fertility can be retained by the removal of only one testicle, or, by the preservation of healthy sperm by freezing. Female lust of a sexual nature is almost always related to energy block presence, destructive imprinting which frustrates the development of a committed relationship, or, personal choice to overstimulate oneself through the use of drugs, herbs, pornography, or fantasy. The removal of the ovaries or of the testes is often a severe health risk for the ceasation of the production of the hormones they generate alters the immune system, the balance of the other hormone producing organs, and, tends to diminish self esteem and encourage multiple forms of depression.
Material lust may be controlled by a personal choice to become involved in volunteer work involving the materially disadvantaged. Living amongst and assisting the poor and homeless can afford one a greater degree of compassion and empathy for others. Instead of continuing to see oneself as separate from and superior to, or, beneath the diginity of others ... one can come to appreciate individual strengths and differences within others AND in oneself. This can also often provide experiences which undeniably enable one to see the association between lustful behavior and the abuse of others. Often, those who have become rich, have done so by taking advantage of others and creating a reciprocal wealth of misery.
7. REGULAR intimate involvement with a committed partner.
This is often an idealistic and intellectualized approach to solving a problem and such approaches are often frustrated by reality and often result in abuse to oneself and one's partner.
If you do not have a committed partner, this option is irrelevant. If you have an extremely good relationship with a commited partner, yet, they have a different libido, this option is too often taken in the context of dependency, which is destructive. In that best of circumstances, a positive outcome will only be managed if the person with the higher libido chooses to be aware of the libido of their partner, respects it, and, in respecting themselves, masturbate to minimize lust feelings.
Lust interferes with constructive communication by encouraging suppressed anger and unconscious anxieties to be acted out against whomever is in the nearby environment most frequently, and with whom one can be less formal and less defensive. Too often, this is a spouse. A constructive goal is consensual inter-dependency.
CONCLUSION:
The first step one must take in coping with excessive masturbation is to first determine if your frequency of expression IS excessive. It may be more of a reality that your intensity of Lustful feelings is directly in parallel to how much you force your system to retain fluids which are more normally expelled on a regular basis.
Truly excessive frequencies and intensities of masturbation will leave you with physical discomforts which may include inflammation of tissues, intra-pelvic soreness of ligaments and a continued sense of lust even immediately following orgasm. This reality more suggests that your behavior is an extension of influential energy block interference, intense imprinting surrounding expectations for sexual activity, or, a true physical difficulty.
Imprinting involves being frequently exposed to patterns of accepted behavior and attitude which are present in our family, with peer groups, and in the larger society through entertainment and religious media. These may encourage subservience to a ritualistic authority which accepts your membership wih the same acknowledgement as that of a person with a number for their name.
These may also encourage one to never communicate honestly and openly with others about their inner concerns and by so doing remain ignorant and easy to manipulate rather than informed and sharing. There may also be an imprinted pattern of one accepting the belief that god created a weak and terrible product, called the human, and that this same god of love, or ambivilence, wants us to live a life of anxiety, denial, hatred, confusion, envy, and lust.
Imprinted behaviors and attitudes are human in origin.
Some of these are very constructive in their encouragement of peace, orderliness, and respect. Others may be destructive and the fact that many people follow them and that most others voice acceptance openly, for membership and approval, and, go against hem in private ... in hypocitical and deceptive. harm does not come from asking and seeking the truth.
Disaster comes from fearing to ask for the truth and accepting and acting on a lie which needlessly abuses and victimizes oneself and others. Adopt relevant standards based on and supported by an experience of love, compassion, openness, honesty, and respect. There will be more happiness and peace in the world if more people make such choice.
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